Tuesday, January 15, 2013

When Your Little Angel, Isn't

It's been rough for Puck being in a full leg cast and we still have 2 weeks to go and then another 4 in a below the knee cast. We slowly incresed time on the crutches and stopped using the wheelchair entirely. It's getting around well, he hardly complains about having to crawl up the stairs or being spongebathed by mom. He's been a real trooper and I'm proud of him for that.

But...

I got an email from his teacher stating that he was being very bossy with his helper classmates and barking orders at them, basically treating them like his servants. This upset me. It made me angry to know that my son was acting this way. That's not how I live my life, it's not how I've raised him to be. He knows better, but yet he still decided to be selfish and ungrateful. I want to feel sorry for him that he is missing out on many things that he enjoys (all physical activities) but instead I was angry and embarrassed at his behavior.

I've always said being a mom is the most humbling experience of my life....and it was as a mom of toddler boys and contiues to be as those little boys are slowing becoming young men. I feel like I have to hurry up and make sure they know right from wrong, treat others thae way they would want to be treated, live by the golden rule and all that... self-doubt creeps in...what if I spoiled them too much, let them get away with too much, what if I didn't raise them to be good and compassionate and fair...what if, what if, what if???

So I've been thnking, what is it exactly that I want from my children?

I want them to grow up to be kind, independant, and thoughful human beings. I want them to know joy, and love, and what it feels like to work hard so that they can value the fruits of that hard work. I want them to treat others with respect and to be respected right back. I want them to be selfless and generous with their time to help others or a cause they belive in.

That's my goal....that is my wish.

1 comment:

L. Merical said...

That's a toughie. I know that you and Hubs are doing right by your children, but sometimes, I guess, the kiddos just don't get it. Hopefully this is just a passing phase and something to do with his expression of his frustrations at his own lack of ability/mobility at the moment. Hang in there!