Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Happy Halloween!

I wish I wasn't at work today. I'm feeling like a kid myself and ready to watch my boys go door-to-door saying, "TRICK-or-TREAT!" This year Muffin will be Superman and Puck has crossed over to the un-cute to be a Vampire (fake blood required)!

My neighborhood is so packed with kids that you can barely get down the sidewalk during Halloween night. After 2 days off school due to Hurricane Sandy I bet it's crazy in those classrooms today:)

Stay safe and don't steal too much candy from your kids stash tonight!!!

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Pumpkin Carving

It's been awhile since I've posted pictures of the boys so I thought today would be a good reason.  You really won't believe how big they have gotten.  After coming through Hurricane Sandy last night I was awaken by 2 boys begging to carve their pumpkins!  I hadn't even sipped my first cup of coffee before I was scooping out pumpkin guts.

Puck is turning 8 this weekend.  8.  I can hardly believe it.  We've got a sleepover planned for a few of his friends.  It ought to be a "fun" night.  Muffin is doing well in Kindergarten and has continued to patch his eye to improve his Amblyopia. Enjoy the pix!

As you can see they are still in their PJ's!

Showing Mom how he wants his face to be carved.

He did almost all the work by himself this year!


Have you ever been called to do something?   Has an idea or a feeling ever crept up into your heart and your mind and grabbed on really tight?

I don't know exactly where it came from but I feel like I've been called to consider adoption.  I know people that have adopted for various reasons.  I have 2 biological children so I don't "need" to adopt to have my family.  I don't need to adopt a child for me, a child needs us to adopt her.  Is it possible that there is some little girl out there waiting for a home in China, or Kazakhstan, or Bulgaria?  I've been reading blogs, and searching the internet trying to soak up every bit of information I can.  There are literally thousands of children abandoned every year because their parents can't take care of them or because they have some kind of special need (minor to severe), or sometimes even just because that baby is a girl.  They don't live in foster care, they live in orphanages....

Unfortunately, adopting a child internationally is extremely expensive.  We're talking $15,000 to $30,000+ and typically travel is required to the county 1 - 3 times and in some instances require very long stays.  It can also take a really long time.   We would have to fundraise, a lot.  Apply for a grant and maybe consider a child with minor or correctable special needs.  There are many children with cleft lips/palates that are easily corrected here in the US.

I feel like I've been called to do this.  I think my husband would consider this as well but getting over the financial hurdles seems bleak at best.

Hmmm.... feeling powerless to help.

Monday, October 15, 2012

Letting Go

I did something this weekend that was very hard for me to do...

I sorted through the baby clothes and passed on much of the collection to friends and the goodwill.

I folded those little clothes for the last time and really had no idea that when I stored then away so carefully that there would never be another baby of mine to wear them.

Time had passed quickly while we were busy living life and even though there are more reasons to not have a 3rd than there are in favor of another baby, that didn't make me want one any less. I think I'll always wonder what it would have been like to have a daughter. I've accepted that part of my life is finished. No more babies for me.

I love my sons more than anything in the world. I'm looking forward to all that is to come.

Wednesday, October 10, 2012


I wouldn't normally say that I am a "religious"person, I don't quote scripture or pray before meals but I do believe in God. My husband and I were married in the Catholic Church where I grew up as a kid. I actually didn't become a catholic until I was in high school. My parents who had also been married in the Catholic Church and pledged to raise their children as catholic, finally got around to it when I was about 15 years old.  I resented it.  I was a hormonal, selfish teen and had more important thinks to worry about, like school and boys;)
Overtime I grew to appreciate going to Mass and even attended occasionally during college.

Fast forward to 2012 and I have an almost 8 year old in the 2nd grade. This is the year that he is supposed to receive 1st Holy Communion. I didn't want him to have negative feelings like I did so I knew the sooner the better at getting him into some kind if religious education was important. I enrolled him in CCD classes so that he could receive 1st Penance and 1st Communion with classmates his age. I was really nervous about it. Nervous for him and nervous for me.  I took him to his first Mass and he did pretty good considering its not all that exciting for kids. (I wish there was a children's Mass...)

His response to the CCD has been amazing.  He likes going.  When I ask him how was class he says, "I loved it!"  He did his CCD homework in the car on the way home from class one night.  So I'm thinking, "Wow, maybe something was missing for him and this was it."  I'm feeling like I made the right call.  It was a difficult decision to make as my husband is not catholic and isn't interested in being catholic but he agreed our son needed to learn about God and that there is someone other than mom and dad calling the shots.

This process will also result in Puck getting Baptised which honestly I have wanted since the beginning.  Puck and I will be on this journey together as in order to teach him the prayers he has to memorize, I have to learn them too.  To help with his homework I'll have to read the stories too.  The memorization of the prayers is intense!  He came home after they quizzed the kids and he only knew one we have our work cut out for us but we'll be doing it together.

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Long Day

It's been a long day and it's only half over. A horrendous commute this morning not to mention a challenging morning at work I wish I could lay my head on the desk and go to sleep. I've got a PTO meeting tonight too so I better find some energy somewhere.

The boys have been staying up later and later so bedtime has been challenging. By the time I put them in bed I am so exhausted and drained from the day I don't make enough time to be patient and snuggle and read books. I feel guilty for this. I want them to get the best of me, not the leftovers. Some nights I just can't give anything more. I vow to change this! They grow bigger everyday. Going through the baby clothes now and deciding what to give away and what to donate. It's so sad folding all those tiny clothes for the last time. I know that I'll blink and they will be teenagers...

Monday, October 8, 2012

Cleaning House

I've had it with packed closets, marked up walls, and wear & tear on my house. No one seems to notice but me so I've decided to repair it myself. Slowly, mind you. I can't fix it all but I can certainly bring it up to a standard that I expect for myself. I painted Pucks room last week on my day off and I forgot how fulfilling it can be to complete a home improvement project.

I can't do it all but the things I can do I will just start crossing them off my list one at a time. Next office:)

In addition to fixing up my house I will also be concentrating on fixing up myself! I can't believe how much weight I've gained and ignoring it isn't going to help. I'm starting a new plan this morning and I'm hoping this will get me back into my favorite jeans before winter is out.

Take pride in my surroundings. Take pride in myself. Be happy:)