Monday, April 9, 2012

Mom Stigma

Do you have friends or co-workers that don't have children?  Either by choice or circumstance, it really doesn't matter.  Crap, I have family members that don't have kids and get the general same feeling from them.

It's hard to be a working mom.  It's hard to be a working mom with a commute that is over an hour, each way.  It's hard being a working mom that has a job requiring some weekend work in the months of April, May, an June.  It's hard being a mom who is now worried she will miss almost every soccer game the boys have this season (their first playing soccer, ever).

On Friday I left work a couple of hours early.  It was super slow as the majority of schools were on Spring Break and I work in sales for a school photography company.  As I was leaving a co-worker and friend made the comment, "I wish I had kids so I could leave early."  I responded that not everyone that has been leaving early has kids.  Having kids myself wasn't even the reason I was leaving early.  I was leaving early because it was Good Friday and I had almost nothing to do.

But still, it got me thinking.  It made me feel bad and reminded me about the constant dance I do as a working mom to please my family and my work.  I work because I have to so don't think that I just have this idea that I need a career to be important and all that...I work to help put food on the table and pay our mortgage.  That's it.  We have Saturday work coming up.  This is a huge source of stress for me as I think I will miss many of the boys soccer games and there isn't much I can do about it.  I don't think I should get  special consideration because I'm a mom but at the same time if you don't have a child depending on you to be somewhere to show your support then maybe it's not as vital that you work or not work on a Saturday.  Yes, if we work on a Saturday we can take a day off during the week but that doesn't do any good for the boys as they are in school and I might as well be at work anyway.

Don't look down on people that have chosen to be a parent.  You may think they are getting off easier than you but you would be wrong.  We spend all out time pleasing you and our kids and families while putting ourselves constantly last.

I'm not complaining.   I wouldn't want it any other way but it is a tough road and often feels like you can't please anyone.

1 comment:

L. Merical said...

I love you, momma bird!