I sat around this small round table in an equally small room while 4 woman discussed observations that have been made about Muffin over the last 4 months (totaling about 3 hours of observations).
Their conclusion: He is on the lower average of average, but not severe enough to qualify for Special Education services. It was all I could do, not to let the tears flow right then and there.
I have had to explain all of my beloved sons shortcomings repeatedly over the last few months (for the last 2 years, actually!) to just about every "professional" that we've come into contact with. It's not a fun experience to constantly discuss and re-hash what's wrong with your child, why he isn't normal, what he can't and doesn't do.
Of course I don't want there to be anything wrong. No, I don't want him to have a disability of any kind. Why must I beg for them to help Muffin.
It was only conceded that he needs gross motor sensory activity prior to school. An intervention meeting has been scheduled for them to meet with his preschool teacher (again), school director, and us...blah, blah, blah...
Then they told me I was doing everything I could for him. Gee, thanks.
I told them he's been evaluated so many times he knows "how" to do it. I told them he can't even explain to me what he wants for his 4th birthday next week or who he wants to invite to his party.
It's like the system makes you hope your child fails their tests just so they can get help. Parents should never have to hope for their child to fail...
I'm so frustrated. I am not a professional therapist. I can't help him at home the way he needs, the way he deserves. I bet is he wasn't in private preschool and private therapy they would have ruled otherwise. Maybe I'm just angry...but I feel like a bad mother, like they think I'm making up what I see...
I just can't believe this.